What do you call a lady that works as hard as a man? Lazy..
Jokes
Jokes
The East Coast blizzard is part of Obama’s Stimulas Plan, all the Black Folks making money shoveling the snow!
Patient: Doctor, I feel suicidal, what do you recommend? Doctor: I recommend that you pay in advance!
I just heard of an awesome Segula! An old, fat bocher walked on a treadmill for 40 days and he became a chosen!
Where does it mention cell phones in Shema? Vedebarta bum, bishivticha bivesecha, uvilechticha baderech Etc…
News alert! Bernie Madoff was pardoned by President Obama. Madoff to be offered leading position in the treasury deptartment!
I am the most anti-social person I know. Of course because I’m anti-social I don’t know too many people…
If you want I can give you a free ticket to Lizensk… Just make a stop in Japan and leave something there…
Get headaches when you are home? Follow the instructions on the aspirin bottle: TAKE 2 ASPIRIN AND KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
Today Obama took time out of his busy day to read a bookto a group of children. It was a fairy tale about a cabinet nominee who paid all his taxes!
Lady: So, you want to become my son-in-law? Boy: Not really, but I don’t see any other way to marry your daughter.
Woman are like an alarm clock. They talk & talk & talk & talk & talk & talk & talk & talk until you fall back asleep.
The world stands on 3 things: TORAH- boy has to learn. AVODA- girl has to work. GIMILUS CHASADIM- the parents have to support them
Doctor: You have only 6 months to live. Patient: I’ll move in with my Shviger, because living with her 6 months will seem like forever.
Someone asked me how often Windows Vista crashes. I answered: Every hour, every half hour, and when it breaks…
My car is unbelievable! It tells me when I’m going too fast, reminds me when I take a wrong turn, and if I get lost it yells at me. It”s called a wife!
There are 3 kinds of people that I absolutely hate: 1. Racists 2. Pollaks 3. Hypocrites 4. And people who can’t count!
Why did the chelemer stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? Because the can said “concentrate” on it.